Alzheimer’s Affects Everyone

Alzheimer’s doesn’t just affect families — it affects the people who show up every day to serve others, too. At City of Faith, this cause is deeply personal. Two of our own team members, Rebecca Baxter and Lisa Matthews, live the reality of loving and caring for family members impacted by Alzheimer’s.

Their stories are honest, raw, and filled with the kind of strength you don’t know you have until you’re forced to find it. They remind us that behind every diagnosis is a caregiver learning to adapt, a family learning to grieve, and a love that refuses to quit.

As we prepare for our City of Faith: A Night to Remember Gala, we share their words not for sympathy—but to shine a light on why this cause matters and why coming together can make a real difference.

From Rebecca Baxter: Alzheimer’s is a disease that you can’t prepare for. It picks a random time to present itself, and you never know how strong you are until you have to take care of someone with the disease.

My world got turned upside down the day her diagnosis was verbalized by the doctor. She was diagnosed in the early stages, so as the disease has taken her brain, little by little, her judgment, moods, personality, ability to do things on her own, and her memory have all changed that little piece at a time.

The day I moved in with her was the day I had to alter my future plans. I thought I knew what would happen being her Caregiver, but the reality was I had no clue. My future is no longer about me; it is about making sure she is taken care of and seeing that all her needs are met. I now have a roommate and someone to take care of daily.

I am now responsible for making sure her medications are correct, she takes her medications, she doesn’t get “conned” by people in emails, text messages and phone calls, she eats 3 meals a day, let her know that she has already eaten 15 cookies that day so it might not be a good idea to have anymore, keep up with the housework, make sure a puzzle is on the table every day to help keep her brain challenged, make sure she sees all of her doctors/attends all of her doctor’s appointments, make sure my sister is available to take care of her if I want to go somewhere overnight (if she is doing something or has to work then I can’t go), and an endless list of other things.

Although Alzheimer’s has impacted every aspect of my life, I wouldn’t trade the time I am spending with my Mother for anything.

From Lisa Matthews: Dealing with a person suffering from Alzheimer’s is challenging. And while it may be difficult for the person suffering from this disease, the challenge for the loved one, is accepting the fact that you remembered the person (young, healthy, sassy, vibrant) and the reality (the person you see, doesn’t match).

Personally, my uncle and Adopted Mother both suffer from this disease, but differently. My Uncle’s situation is based on numerous factors. He becomes angry and is easily frustrated when communicating with him. My adoptive mother, who is a Retired Chief State Pretrial Probation Officer, memory issues vacillate. Therefore, in the middle of a conversation, she may remember what you are talking about and 15 minutes later, she is talking about a subject you are not sure of.

I think the biggest challenge for me is “Accepting the person and their illness, where they are due to the love I have for them. Also, wanting the person to be who they were, and it is difficult to accept who they are, because the person you remember may never show up AGAIN.

For my survival, I try to mentally prepare for the conversation and prepare for the repeated conversations. But most importantly, I have accepted that these are the challenges when dealing with these loved ones, who suffer from this disease.